Running hungry

I have lots of friends who are runners. I have often blogged about how envious I am of these friends. They actually enjoy running. They run for fun, friendship, and that mythical runners high. Not me as I have previously stated, I run for what it does for my body. (The only high I feel during running comes from hypoxia.) Or I should qualify what it used to do for my body.

When I "got in shape" 4 years ago, I sensibly combined exercise and a healthy diet. It worked quite well for me and allowed me to continue at a "wouldn't kill me to drop 10lbs, but I look okay" weight for 3 years. As mentioned, I gained weight when I moved to Philly. I have gotten most of it off. However there's a catch.

Instead of my previously used method, I just changed my diet. I didn't starve myself - I just dropped my calories with smarter choices. I was happy that I could wear my clothes again, but not thrilled with the way I looked in them. My arms had lost all definition, my legs (once my best asset) now begged for cover, my butt headed in all directions but North, and we won't even discuss my abs. Therefore last week, I decided to recommit to an exercise plan - specifically running and weights.

I was actually quite excited. I had stalled on my weight loss and figured a little cardio on my previous diet would get things started again. Boy was I wrong. I have actually gained weight since I started exercising. The reason: I can't quit eating. I run in the mornings. Not because I am a morning person (as we all know) or because the books tell you that morning is the best time to exercise. I run in the morning because it is the most consistent time that I can count on being mine. I do best with schedules. I need someone to physically drag my butt into the gym evenings (where are you Jill?), but I seem to be able to get there on my own at 4am (ironic huh?).

However, the fall out of that early morning work-out seems to be a ravenous appetite for the rest of the day. I have tried everything - protein, starch, even fat for breakfast - all to no avail. I refuse to quit exercising because the sane person in my head knows that it is the right thing to do. I just need to quiet the insane person in my head that thinks - wow I ran this morning - "Let's have a cupcake." I am at least choosing to believe that I am building a very toned body under these layers of adipose. Just need to keep chipping away.